Written by Wayne Davis
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Wednesday, 22 January 2014

image for Siamese Twins Win City Council Seat

Lisa and Liza Kozominsky's parents always told them they could do anything they wanted, and these spunky sisters did just that by winning a City Council seat in Piginpoke Mississippi.

Running on a "The KKK Wasn't That Bad" platform, the sisters, joined at the hip since birth, became the city's sweethearts after their parents released them from their 8x10 prison cell in the families apple shed.

The girls started their careers in the carnival, traveling from place to place with the Great Freakowitz Circus, covering the entire southern circus circuit. But puberty and a chronic constipation problem ended their performing days and the girls spent the next 30 years in captivity.

"One day Papa came down to the cage and told us we were running for the City Counsil, he washed us down with the hose and off we went" said a excited Liza. News of the girls "out of the box" political positions and their physical limitations made them a sure win in the local election.

"It's so wonderful to see the sun again" Lisa said as she brushed her now graying hair. "I can't wait to start putting our whites only policies to work for the great people of Piginapoke".

The girls will be at the Parkview VFW for a town hall meeting this Thursday night at 6:00pm followed by a spaghetti supper and cross burning at 8:00pm in front of the public housing project on the bad side of town, residents are urged to bring their own crosses and lighters as supplies are limited.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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