Written by queen mudder
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Sunday, 19 January 2014

image for Chris Christie hires awesome NYC attorney Randy Mastro
Gov Christie recently had some very expensive bridge work

New Jersey - "At five thousand bucks an hour his services don't exactly come cheap," embattled New Jersey Governor Chris Christie admitted today, "about the same rate as my orthodontic surgeon charges for root canals, minus the anaesthetic."

Putting the smile back on the Governor's face is New York attorney Randy M Mastro, the awesome courtroom bruiser who's fresh from pulverizing Ecuador's bent shyster lawyer Steven Donziger in Chevron's racketeering lawsuit before Judge Lewis Kaplan's Southern District Manhattan court.

The Gibson Dunn co-head of litigation has taken time out from his busy schedule to do for Chris Christie what he's been doing for the San Ramon super major in a long running Ecuadorian eco fraud and racketeering scam.

A career honed as a mob prosecutor and deputising for NY Mayor Rudi Giuliani sees Mastro call all the New Jersey Governor's procedural shots as a volley of two dozen subpoenas hits Chris Christie in the Bridgegate Affair.

"What really made me hire him was something I recently read on the web," Christie added, "where a former court room litigator likened being up against Randy to wrestling with an alligator; sounds just like my kinda guy."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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