Written by Al N.
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Thursday, 16 January 2014

image for FBI To Begin Regulating Faygo Pop, the Weapons Used by Gang Member Juggalos of Insane Clown Posse
The FBI will start rounding up suspects that fit the clown profile.

Washington, DC The FBI, since labeling the Insane Clown Posse group of fans the Juggalos a "gang," has since begun to call for regulation on the sale of Faygo Pop, used by Juggalos and the ICP themselves as deadly weapons.

The Juggalos are known to shake up the Faygo and spray it at people, turning them into a sticky mess. Is it any wonder the FBI is getting involved?

"Most people would rather be waterboarded then Faygoed," spoke FBI Director James B. Comey. "It is one of the most evil things one can do to someone. That is why we are making it a first degree federal felony to Faygo someone in this manner. And why the Juggalos will NEVER get off the FBI's Most Evil Gangs list. This is even worse than the Justin Bieber Egg Crisis!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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