Written by Moose
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Tuesday, 14 January 2014

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WASHINGTON, DC - The US Department of Education Secretary, Arne Duncan, announced today that Graduation requirements for US high school students would be eliminated to increase the graduation rate.

Four new exams that will be required for graduation will be developed to ensure that high school students will be proficient at texting, talking and walking. The Department of Education decided in June that students were being stressed out and too many were failing proficiency tests.

In a press release issued today, Arne Duncan wrote "To Many of are stoodents our knot prepeared two entur are werk forse. This axshun will enabel them too excel i wat thay due well".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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