A local Islamic man who recently arrived from Islam came to America carrying big dreams of spreading Sharia Law to all the four corners of the circular Earth.
Upon arriving in America, he immediately set about destroying such principles as religious freedom by attending a mosque instead of frequenting a Christian church.
In order to ingratiate himself within the community and appease the powers that be, he arrived at a Bass Pro Shop and acquired several semi-automatic machine guns, for hunting of course.
According to his own account, "I saw all the advertisements promoting the second Amendment and assumed that my neighbors would appreciate my purchase of more guns than I could carry. Oh, how I was wrong. The next thing I knew, angry mobs arrived at my doorstep, and FBI agents began staking out my house from my backyard."
He merely wanted to fit in with his community; however, with the constant taunts and the crowd of law enforcement literally breathing down his neck, he came to realize that he could not be the holy warrior of his dreams, but only an urban black man.
The Super-PAC, American Heritage Foundation refused to comment, implicitly, because they never heard about this incident.