If Morgan Masterson can finish his creation, and he's very close, he will have invented a protective garment that will keep the family jewels safe and sound under many conditions.
"I've made the prototype already and I need to get some volunteers to test it out.
Masterson says he thinks his 'codpiece' could help anyone whose jobs place them in harms way and would allow them to have children even if they are shot in the nuggets.
"All I need is a few men to come out here and give it a try. I don't need any eunuchs because how could we tell if it worked or not?"
Masterson says the underwear should resist several shots from a 9mm and .22 caliber handgun and that he had them both all loaded and ready.
"I thought this up when I was on a helicopter in Vietnam while we were sitting on our helmets."
After advertising for six months, still no volunteers to test the kicking, knifing or shooting man's 'personal property'.
"I can't understand it", says Masterson. "Here I do all this work and not a man one who will test it out. Guess I'll go kidnap a load of winos."