Written by Bureau
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Thursday, 21 November 2013

image for Hawaii State Lawmaker Destroys Homeless Shopping Carts!

Hawaii state lawmaker Tom Brewster stated that he was fed up with the state's homeless problem. His solution, however, has left him branded as a vigilante.

Brewster took a sledgehammer to their shopping carts.

"I get a lot of complaints about stolen and abandoned shopping carts in the area, and I was thinking as a public servant, 'What can I do that would be practical and I can literally get done while they're asleep overnight,'" Brewster told our $tar$ reporter and others.

"Don't these people need a cart to put the things in that they cannot carry?", asked one reporter.

He was immediately asked to leave.

That was yesterday.

Then, last night a bridge collapsed and backed traffic for miles each way.

A homeless man was arrested.

"He took a sledgehammer to our carts. We borrowed a few for ourselves and some friends that often sleep under that bridge", stated a man who called himself Clyde the Camel because of the small hump on his back we presumed.

"If they took a sledge hammer to our carts. We figured he would want to take our sleeping place away from us next so we gave him a hand."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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