Written by queen mudder
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Saturday, 16 November 2013

image for Split Beaver Full Moon plus imminent solar flip to wreak havoc on LA porn industry astrologers warn
Stuff. Like this.

Los Angeles, California - Sunday's 25'25" degrees Taurus fool moon first earned its Split Beaver moniker during the 1998 Clinton impeachment trial when astrologers upgraded the November aspect from its plain Beaver Full Moon status on account of mooning stuff in the Monica Lewinsky romp.

This year the crazy lunation takes place hot on the heels of an impending solar flip when the sun's magnetic field suddenly reverses polarity and sends mayhem particles into outer space.

Quite how this will affect LA porn isn't immediately clear due to rapid recent detumescence in the skin flick industry following new state-wide legislation requiring on-camera porn actors to sheath up.

Fortunately star gazers at celebwatch LA FagHagSladgMag.con website see all this astro-stress as nothing more than textbook precession-of-the-equinoxes stuff. [WTF that? - 'Ed']

Porny box orifice receipts may be down right now but upcoming zodiac aspects - as well as a plethora of sun-grazing comets - promise an eventual turnaround in porn movie fortunes.

Expect filing permit prices to rocket soon after next month's Winter Solstice.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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