Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 24 November 2013

image for Governor Chris Christie Says He May End Up Forming His Own Political Party
Governor Christie has gone on the popcorn diet, which is a bag of popcorn for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

TRENTON, New Jersey - Governor Chris Christie says he is bound and determined to get the 100-pound liposuction he has been talking about.

He told American Spotlight Magazine that he knows he can do it because he is a New Jerseyan and New Jerseyan's can do whatever they set their mind on doing.

Governor Christie speaking with ASM's Cutter Shiloh informed him that this past February he had a gastric bypass.

He commented that he also had a lenguista apretada, which is a procedure that tightens the tongue in order to reduce the caloric intake.

Governor Christie has said that there is nothing that is going to keep him from the 2016 Republican presidential campaign trail, not Sarah "Snowflake" Palin, Mitt "The Twit" Romney, Ann "Trigger Face" Coulter, or even Bill "The Hormone Pill" O'Reilly.

He then let it be known that if he has to, he will form his own political party; The Lipo Party.

The popular governor remarked that The Lipo Party will make a snack out of Palin's Tea Bag Party.

SIDENOTE: Governor Christie stated that once he loses 100 pounds he may talk to the producers of Dancing With The Stars about becoming a member of the celebrity group.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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