Written by Lyndon
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Thursday, 14 November 2013

image for American Soldiers in Afghanistan liken tour to a Tom Cruise filming gig
Director Til Nielsen, trying to decide how Tom Cruise can safely cross a plaza without getting hurt

KABUL - Many American solidiers currently on a one-year tour in Afghanistan find that their time spent away from family and other loved ones is most comparable a drawn-out movie shoot of an actor of such caliber as Tom Cruise.

"Risking our lives daily," said field sargeant Romulo Gomez, "getting our asses shot off, not being able to communicate with our family. I know it's unfair to say this, but I feel like Tom Cruise."

It's been long recognized that Tom Cruise often spends as much as four months away from his daughter Suri, a time period unheard of even in Hollywood.

Private First Class Paul Gorens tried to put it into perspective. "Between shoots, I've heard that Tom Cruise sits in a trailer. At least we get to sit in a spacious Hummer."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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