Written by queen mudder
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Tuesday, 29 October 2013

image for First visual of the Christmas Comet scheduled for pagan New Year's Eve
The view from 6001 Bollinger Canyon Road, San Ramon

San Ramon, California - Wiccans, eat yer hearts out: this year's Halloween celebrations should see the first glimpse of the astonishingly beautiful Comet Ison as it heads towards its debut transit of Planet Earth.

Already dubbed the Christmas Comet because of the multi-colored fairy lights quality of its tail the sungrazer is expected to be visible to the naked eye low in the western horizon shortly after sunset this Thursday.

Viewed by telescope from the roof garden at 6001 Bollinger Canyon Road, San Ramon this celestial cakewalk should be particularly dazzling as exceptional astral conditions pave the way for an absolute show-stopper of a star.

"The comet's Samhain - or Pagan New Year - debut easily outshines any spooky Halloween stuff," a Big Oil astro-litigation specialist commented this afternoon, "kinda cool for Crude Heaven HQ to host its inaugural earthly parade."

Meanwhile in Lower Manhattan, NYC courthouse the sun shines brightly for fabled attorney Randy Mastro as he continues to pulverize Steven Donziger's Ecuadorian fantasy factory in the demolition of a $19.2billion racketeering suit.

Expect some major sparks to fly around November 3rd's solar eclipse.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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