Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 23 October 2013

image for PETA Vows To Make Research Clinics Stop Forcing Hamsters To Smoke Marijuana
A research hamster shown just moments before being forced to smoke a marijuana joint.

NORFOLK, Virginia - The largest animal rights group in the United States has vowed to stop several animal research clinics from mistreating hamsters.

Mimosa Ledbetter the executive director has said that she sent undercover operatives who infiltrated an animal research clinic in Tarzana, California and one in Bangor, Maine.

Mrs. Ledbetter reported that the research clinic in Tarzana was giving half a dozen hamsters what amounted to the equivalent of 15 marijuana cigarettes each over a two hour period.

She remarked that the six hamsters could not stop giggling and they devoured the two large size pepperoni pizzas they were given within 8 minutes.

Ledbetter stated that the clinic in Maine had given four hamsters the equivalent of 20 cannabis cigarettes each and they made them watch television with the sound turned completely down.

She said that the Bangor hamsters started laughing uncontrollably and then began playing leapfrog with each other during the commercials.

Two of the male hamsters were observed gang-tickling one of the female hamsters until she peed all over her cage.

SIDENOTE: Mrs. Ledbetter has said that she has already forwarded the videos to President Obama and she has asked that he take immediate action to stop these innocent little hamsters from being turned into potheads.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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