Written by Neil Levine
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Thursday, 19 October 2006

image for Joe Lieberman And Ned Lamont Duke It Out
The Ultimate Political Smack Down

Freestone City, Constitution State, Connecticut---Joe Lieberman and Ned Lamont continue to duke it out in Connecticut, a political battleground state, if ever there was one.

The big fight allegedly started when the challenger, the previously unknown Lamont, heretofore looked on as a lightweight politically, threw a volley of stiff left jabs and quick upper cuts at Lieberman, the heavyweight senior Senator from Connecticut, resulting in his knocking Lieberman for a loop into the ropes. "That hurts," complained Yankee Joe when he found out he needed a new line to run on.

"You're out of here," Lefty Lamont proclaimed proudly. "I'm the new political heavyweight king around here."

"No way," Lieberman retorted once he regained his feet and was able to stand up independently on his own two feet without his usual supporting entourage of well versed inside political operatives spinning the philosophical magic that had kept him in the political boxing ring for eighteen good years. "I have had a good run but I am not done yet. Wait for me to start mixing it up," he yelled at the political pundits trying to referee the battle at closed quarters."I will take the fight to the forum of public opinion and play to win. Lamont thinks he can run inside the Nutmeg state, but I can surround him with competing interests and take the battle home again jiggedy jig. Oh, for the lack of a knockout punch," lamented Lieberman. "This snook seems to like political abuse."

Lieberman has appealed to the crowd for support. The battle royal has attracted a national crowd. "This is the big one. The fight for survival. The ultimate political smack down. When is this Johnny come lately going to give up? Let him announce a date," shouted Lieberman.

As a result of the heavy assault on his positioning by Lieberman, Lamont began to slip behind his opponent as Lieberman scored a point here and a point there, adding to his collection of political trophies.

Left hook. Right jab. A couple of round houses. Left. Right. Left. Right went the calculated blow by blow attacks.

"I'm waiting to hear when you want to cut and run, Ned? Ned? Stop crying. You've got to be tough to fight the big political battles in Washington and if you're not tough you might as well be going softly."

(We are the Champions by Queen plays in the background.)

Make Neil Levine's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 plus 5?

9 7 8 22

Go to top