Washington DC - (Associated Mess): Trouble in Republican TheoCon paradise tonight as the beleagured Bush Administration fights a rearguard action to stop its downward plunge into freefall ratings oblivion following the busting of lurid juvenile sex correspondent Mark Folie-a-Deux and the outing of his boss Dennis Hastert as a dissembling abuse denier sponsored by the Ancient American Order of the Skull 'N' Bones's Osteoporosis Division.
Folie-a-Deux has spent the day hiding behind an official Bonesmen's smokescreen as reporters demanded access to White House classified files that have alleged the disgraced ex-member of the House of Representatives caucus on missing and exploited children had been a known serial child sex fiend working on Bush Dynasty 'special projects' designed to smear senior NATO military intelligence top brass who hold incriminating evidence of George Bush's criminal records.
And in London, investigative reporters are probing Whitehall rumors that among the many young men on Folie-a-Deux's former staff who were recipients of his craven e-mail solicitations, the UK Prime Monster's son Euan Blair himself may have had one such cyberspace encounter while working as an intern in an official Republican stink-tank earlier this year.
Meanwhile lawyers acting for Folie-a-Deux have stated that their client was the victim of sex abuse by Catholic clergy during his formative years and as such deserves sympathy more than the oprobium being heaped upon him by the American media.
The scandal however shows no signs of abating as more members of Congress have demanded to know just how nuch the Presdident himself has always known of Folie-a-Deux's behavior.
And at a remotely sited alcohol rehab in the Arizona desert run by the Bonesmen's Osteoporosis division which claims the honor of de-programming George W Bush himself after his personal descent into substance abuse, Foley-a-Deux is being monitored for signs of the 'behavioural problems' that he has admitted led him into his seminal career as Republican politician in the first place.
And as White House aides continue their damage limitation action plan to promote Republican 'family values' agenda, executives at Faux TV are equally perplexed as to how best present this continuing sex pest saga that has held the top news headlines on coast to coast television all week.
The predicament of millions of viewers' children contacting the TV networks to ask the bewildering question "what is a pedophile?" is one that may stump the TheoCon agenda of cleaning up broadcasting in the interests of keeping innocent American minds pure and chaste.