Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 22 August 2013

image for Crime Boss Salvatore Goombalini Tells President Obama His Offer To Capture Edward Snowden Still Stands
Sal has been invited to have a nice Italian dinner at the White House with President Obama and Vice-President Biden.

BROOKLYN - The notorious Mafioso Salvatore Goombalini, who heads one of New York City's biggest mob families, has informed President Obama that his offer of a week ago still stands.

Goombalini, who is the eldest of 10 brothers, let the president know that if he gives him the word he will send two of his 'boys' to Russia and they will capture and return Edward Snowden back to America.

The mob leader prides himself in being able to get someone that even the FBI, the CIA, or the Secret Service cannot apprehend.

Sal wanted to stress to the president that he'll bring back Snowden as a patriotic gesture from a man who is proud to be an American and live the American dream of making tons and tons and tons of money thanks to his family's little restaurant supply business.

SIDENOTE: Goombalini said that he recently spoke with Anthony Weiner face-to-face and he told him to tone down all of his vulgar BS because he does not appreciate his little Italian granddaughters having to hear all of these constant 'Weiner' jokes.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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