Written by J.K. Baltzersen
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Friday, 9 August 2013

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Sasha Obama's hamster mysteriously missing

Washington, D.C. The Obama sisters, Malia and Sasha, are currently not playing with each other.

This is said to be due to a recent visit by a cousin of the sisters at the White House. Malia Obama peeked in the cousin's secret diary when she -- Malia, that is -- thought no one was looking. However, Sasha's hamster managed somehow mysteriously to notify the cousin. Exactly how this happened has not been made known to The Spoof.

Malia wanted the hamster punished for spying on her, but Sasha, a loving hamster owner as she is, would not allow that. Sasha is reported to have said that it was Malia who was spying. Malia is said to have rejected this by saying that it is not spying, but totally legitimate security, when the big girl in the family does it. An anonymous source of The Spoof says her father agreed on the point.

Sasha has been unwilling to turn over her hamster, and Malia and the sisters' father, the most powerfull man in the world, have thus far been unable to get a hold of it.

Since Sasha is unwilling to turn over the hamster, and Malia otherwise has been unable to get a hold of the animal, Malia is unwilling to play any further with Sasha. The father in the family is reported to have said that that is so childish that even the family father could do that.

The President has just moments ago directed "No Such Agency" and other agencies to find the leaker of this highly confidential first family incident. The President cannot tolerate such spying on his family. An unnamed contractor of one of those agencies is suspected.

Time will tell if The Spoof returns with more on this story -- or returns at all...

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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