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Tuesday, 2 July 2013

Lester Montoya, speaking for the group Rational Law Reform, said yesterday that Texas Senator Ted Cruz has gone too far in his latest proposed amendment to the senate bill designed to overhaul immigration policy in the U.S.

The amendment would require all candidates for U.S. citizenship to demonstrate the ability to dance without moving their hips.

"This amendment is clearly designed to discriminate against people of Latin-American descent and other people of color in favor of northern Europeans who, as we all know, are born with broomsticks in their spines," said Montoya.

The proposed amendment is viewed favorably by many in the mostly white, male, Anglo body of the senate who see it as a reasonable proof of cultural assimilation.

"I just can't do it," said a tearful Nona Lopez. "I can wait the thirteen years, pay the fines, and memorize the Constitution.

"I have a double doctorate in chemistry and physics and I speak and read English more fluently than 99 percent of native-born citizens, but I simply cannot move like they want me to. I've tried and tried, but my hips will not obey my brain."

The reform bill, already loaded with expensive and onerous requirements, will now move to the House of Representatives where it is expected to be further encumbered with amendments and will ultimately collapse of its own weight.

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