Written by Tania Lewis
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Topics: Party

Tuesday, 28 May 2013

image for Neighborhood Shut-Ins Still Talking about the Rockin' Good Time They had at Buffalo Wild Wings 2 1/2 weeks ago!

Goodlettsville, TN: Melissa Briggs, an office admin for a Davidson's county medical practice, along with her on again off again boyfriend of 4 years, Ron Fiene, a part-time car audio sales associate at the Goodlettsville Best Buy, and full time gamer, are still bragging about, "a fuckin' rocking good time we had," Fiene squeaks, with buddies getting shit-faced and singing karaoke few Fridays ago at the local Buffalo Wild Wings.

Joined by Mary Jane and Steve Pickett, Briggs and Fiene hardly find the time to enjoy a wild night out like they used to when they were in their 20's. Briggs says, "we are just so busy, my full time job and helping out grannie on the weekends, of course Ronny, hum-well, I can hardly get him away from his gaming buddies. But, I made it clear, if he doesn't shape up and start taking me out again, well, I'll remind him of a few months ago when I started dating Cory again." Fiene was not too keen on that situation.

Mary Jane is Melissa's BFF. Melissa planned her bridal shower, they do all their Black Friday holiday shopping together, and at different times, both were engaged to Steve. Briggs and Steve bickered incessantly, broke up amenable, and now enjoy an occasional night on the town in different social circles.

"I don't see why I get all the blame, I ask Missy all time if she wants to hang with me and guys, says Ron. But she's always yacking on the phone, and before you know it, I'm just about beating my last score on Warcraft and the weekend is over. And let's face it after the gaming system I bought this winter, investing in my new car rims, and the glass pipe-THAT, I bought for both of us, money is kind of tight."

Melissa and Mary Jane reserved a table at Buffalo Wild Wings, Ron's co-worker Reggie, the token black guy, and his white girlfriend convinced everyone to come out because, "my friend is D.J. this Friday, and he'll probably set up karaoke," stated Reggie. Karaoke on a Friday is usually a no-go, the crowd is usually pretty steady, and not much space for performance. But, with an extra additional party room off to the left, the group can sing the night away.

The following Monday morning, Melissa is thrilled to tell her office-mates about the 7 pitchers of beer they had, and how her friend Samone showed up. "I'm proud of her, she's been 3 months sober, and putting some weight back on. Samone, another of Melissa's high-school friends, loved to party and had quite an affliction for pills. Her partying took a left turn when she made an illegal turn into the wrong lane of traffic. She was arrested for driving under the influence. They apprehended her from her car, which was neatly parked into a grocery store shopping cart loading zone.

Samone sentenced to a rehab and curfew, and now living back at her parents' house, is now reduced to hanging out with her boring friends. "Hey, I had to get out of the house, and I know Ronny will probably have some weed. I'll have to show him my nipples, but anything is better than spending another weekend night with my fuckin' stepdad," gasps Samone.

Getting off to a slow start, the shut-ins had a difficult time feeling at ease. Nothing a few pitchers of Coors Lights can't take care of, followed by 3 assorted appetizer trays, and some shots of Jamieson.

Reggie started things off with his rendition of the Cars classic, "Whose Gonna Drive You Home" while the gang answered each line with, "not your wife, she's shit-faced!" Then the girls got gutsy and sang two numbers, back to back with Bryan Adam's hit "Heaven" and Whitney's, "How Will I Know."

Melissa, while hanging in her work break room today discusses the night at BWW with her friend Polly, "it was awesome. And then wouldn't ya know, my little cousin shows up with her new guy and their friends, so I buy them a round of Comacozi shots," The whole group joined in for a chorus of The Steve Miller Band's, "The Joker," right before last call.

After a four-hour drink fest, Reggie and his girl departed, while Melissa, Ron, Steve, and Mary Ann decided to continue the festivities at the Steak and Shake, where they were sure to harass the under-paid wait-staff with obnoxious requests to, and I quote…"have their steaks shaken, not stirred." And their routy behavior didn't stop there, they went crazy by opening all the sugar packets, emptying the contents all over the freshly mopped floor.

The night ended with both couples red-eyed and spent. Right before retiring and going into their respective cars, the group decides to make further plans to save money, and take a road trip to Virginia, for a long weekend this summer, to visit Kings Dominion Theme Park.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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