Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 16 March 2013

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Indiana is setting the nation's pace in regards to terminating the televising of television reality shows.

INDIANAPOLIS - The Hoosier State has gone on record as being the first state in the nation that will be banning all television reality shows.

State Senator Cicely G. Flexbi, 64, of South Bend, informed the news media that her and fellow Senator Mavis Shimmyshag, 61, of Terre Haute, decided that the tremendous volume of reality shows have no socially redeeming value whatsoever.

Both elderly senators agreed that viewers of reality shows tend to think that the reality show participants are actually real when in reality they are as fake as John Travolta's hair.

Senator Shimmyshag noted that reality television show studies conducted in 91 of Indiana's 92 counties showed that citizens of Indiana who watched an average of 105 or more hours of reality shows per week turned into habitual couch potatoes, sofa squash, recliner rutabagas, and furniture figs.

Senator Flexbi noted that the show The Jersey Shore for example is no more representative of the youths in New Jersey than GOP mouthpiece Ann "Giddy Up" Coulter is representative of Playboy Magazine centerfolds.

The senator from South Bend added that the stars of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo are not your typical examples of citizens from the great southern state of Georgia.

She did point out that yes there are some folks in the Peach State would do resemble the Shannon and Thompson family's, but the state-wide total probably only numbers somewhere around 370.

SIDENOTE: Both Senator's Flexbi and Shimmyshag will propose to the Indiana State Senate that Indiana television stations drop all reality shows and replace them with shows which showcase such subjects as NASCAR, old TV western reruns like Gunsmoke, Wagon Train, and Have Gun Will Travel, and nice wholesome family game shows such as Wheel of Fortune, The Family Feud, and Talk To The Friggin' Hand.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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