Written by John_L
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Sunday, 3 March 2013

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Leno in retirement

Shortly after announcing that he will retire in 2014 Jay Leno announced that in January 2015 he will come back and whine to the press so much that NBC will sack his replacement Jimmy Fallon and give him back the 'Tonight' show for a third stint.

The move will play out in almost the same way as well Leno last left 'Tonight' then spent his time bitching about Conan O'Brian until he got the job back.

"I just want people to notice me." The veteran broadcaster said "The ratings have been down since the election as people don't want to watch someone from the losing side all night so to get them back up I'm going to retire and then comeback. This will see me able to discredit Fallon at the same time as I did with CoCo so I take out a rival and get top dog status back."

"This time I hope the chin will retire for good." David Letterman said in a statement yesterday "I don't think he will but the fall out will provide me with weeks and weeks of material."

"I'm not allowed to discuss that individual." was all Conan would say when asked.

"I'm glad he is going now he is off the screens maybe he will take my advice and get that chin seen to." Joan Rivers commented on QVC "I know a great surgeon in the Bronx who will do a wonderful job."

NBC are already planning a special night to celebrate Leno's return.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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