Written by Ducksley
Print this

Tuesday, 26 February 2013

image for US Government Might Turn Over Air Traffic Control to Bird Watchers

If the mandatory budget cuts known as sequestration go into effect in a few days, the Federal Aviation Administration says it will have no choice but to turn over air traffic control services to bird watchers.

"I think it'll work out great," said FAA spokesman Huckleberry Wunch, who added, "They're already used to standing for long periods of time looking through binoculars, and that's pretty much all they have to do."

Mildred Chigrigger, 72, is a longtime bird watcher who is hoping to snare one of the air traffic control jobs.

"I've got a couple of cataracts, but I can still tell the difference between a mud-slapping hornbill and a red-crested metalpecker from 300 yards, so figuring out whether a plane is a 767 or an Airbus shouldn't be all that difficult," she said.

Make Ducksley's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 1 multiplied by 4?

5 11 25 4
45 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience on our website, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more