Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 28 February 2013

image for Alaska Admits It Has Developed An Atomic Bomb
President Obama on the phone talking to Vice-President Joe Biden regarding Alaska's atomic bomb.

JUNEAU, Alaska - After months of diligent research The Amalgamated Department of Data Gathering, which is based in Chicago, is reporting some astounding news.

According to ADDG representative Bagby B. Buckleybox his agency has learned that the state of Alaska has secretly been working on the development of an atomic bomb.

Buckleybox stated to Political Salad Bar Magazine that as strange as it seems his agency now has documented proof that the 49th state has developed a weapon of mass destruction.

When asked where exactly the atomic bomb is located, Buckleybox said that the information was qualified and that only four people know the exact location.

When pressed to reveal the names he replied, Bingham P. Kickerfiggin, executive director of The Amalgamated Department of Data Gathering, President Barack Obama, Vice-President Joe Biden, and the First Lady Michelle Obama.

Buckleybox was asked what steps the United States government plans on taking and if former GOP vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin has any knowledge of the atomic bomb, which reportedly has been nicknamed Frosty The Snowman.

The ADDG rep stated that the president and vice-president are presently meeting with former speaker of the house Nancy Pelosi to determine how they will approach this highly sensitive situation.

The state of Alaska at first denied any knowledge of an atomic bomb, but after being shown dozens of photographs it has finally admitted that it does in fact possess a full fledged atomic bomb.

Buckleybox then added that in regards to Mrs. Palin having any knowledge that is extremely unlikely since "Snowflake" Palin is now considered a persona non grata by a vast majority of Alaskan residents.

In Other News. Jack Nicholson, 75, who hit on Jennifer Lawrence, 22, at the Academy Awards is alleged to have now hit on 25-year-old glitter singer Ke$ha.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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