Written by DP Whitehead
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Topics: Pope, Pope Benedict

Monday, 11 February 2013

image for New Jersey Man Applies For Vacant Pope Position
Eric Tisdale, and his Wife, Joan, Looking forward To Relocating To Italy

A New Jersey man could become the first ever American Pope after he completed an online application form for the vacant position which he saw advertised on monsterjobs.com.

Eric Tisdale, 44, unemployed but a former butcher feels he is "in with a chance" on snagging the role of pontiff and is now just waiting to hear back from the Vatican whether or not they want to interview him and maybe do a credit check.

Just minutes after the spiritual leader of 1.2 billion Roman Catholics, Pope Benedict XVI, surprised the world Monday by saying he will resign at the end of the month "because of advanced age' the position was posted on several job hunting websites.

Tisdale claims, that unlike the former incumbent of the position he won't leave the Vatican in the lurch and will fulfill any contract offered, unless of course he is head hunted by another religion, who may offer a better health care package.

"I can do this job very easily" explained Tisdale "I can wave, I look great in hats, I can carry a big stick, I have twitter and I don't mind kissing babies and I do not object to anyone, man nor beast, kissing my ring."

Despite Mr Tisdale's confidence that he will get the job he is still actively looking for work in the Hobeken area.

"I have an interview next week at Walmart as a greeter, so if I get that job I may have to turn this one down."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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