Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 5 February 2013

image for Submarine With 17 Illegal Aliens Captured Near Catalina Island
A photo of the Mexican submarine M-9208317. (Photo courtesy of The U.S. Coast Guard).

LONG BEACH, California - The United States Coast Guard has just issued a statement that they have captured a submarine from Mexico.

Captain Chauncey S. Shoomheimer informed the news media that the submarine was 49 feet in length and was being operated by a crew of two.

The submarine had numerical markings designating it as the M-9208317. Captain Shoomheimer stated that when the sub was boarded by his men, they found a total of 17 illegal aliens within the confines of the vessel.

The captain noted that the submarine appeared to have originally been part of the Costa Rican navy as he said that it smelled highly of bananas.

The two man crew at first did not cooperate with the American authorities but after being shown a vivid video of several individuals being tased with an industrial taser gun they were only too glad to cooperate.

The commander of the sub, who was identified as Captain Rodolfo "Jose" Cuervo, said that the sub is based in Ensenada, Mexico.

He divulged that the passengers were picked up in Tijuana, after each paid a ticket fee of 31,645 pesos [$400 - U.S.]

SIDENOTE: Captain Shoomheimer remarked that the 17 illegal aliens will all be flown back down to Tijuana and the two man crew will be flown back to Ensenada. He was asked about the submarine. He replied that it will most probably be sold on eBay.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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