Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 31 January 2013

image for Space Ship Lands In Gary Busey's Backyard
Gary says that he took this photo of a space alien outside his home this past New Year's Eve.

TARZANA, California - Someone once said that Gary Busey's rowboat is missing both oars.

It's also been said about the man with the bird's nest hairdo that he has all the charm of a speed bump.

But Gary has a tremendous sense of humor. He knows that he may not be as good looking as George Clooney, or as rich as Bill Gates, but he understands that when it comes to being one confused son-of-a-gun he takes the cake, the pie, and the sopapillas.

Gary made the national headlines yesterday when he claimed that as he was barbecuing some baby back ribs in the backyard of his Tarzana home, he suddenly looked up in the sky and saw a brilliant flash.

Within 19 seconds he says that a cylindrical object swooped down right across his patio deck and he could clearly see that it was a space ship.

He quickly put down his bottle of Johnnie Walker Red and picked up his cell phone to take a picture. Just as he was about to click the camera the space ship landed in the middle of his backyard between an avocado bush and a tangerine tree.

Gary quickly went in the house to use the bathroom. While he did his pet Rottweiler, Fluffy went ballistic and tried to bite the space ship. But apparently the metal was hot-as-hell since Fluffy quickly made a bee line for her backyard doggy water dish.

When Busey returned to the backyard he noticed right away that the space ship was gone. It had taken off while he was in the house going number one.

He noticed Fluffy sitting by the avocado bush intently licking her lips with her tongue.

Gary went back to grilling the baby back ribs and picked up his bottle of Johnnie Walker Red as he sang the lyrics to "I'm Henry The Eight" by Herman's Hermits.

SOME GARY BUSEY BUSEYISMS


  • Nature is like Lindsay Lohan except without all of those freckles and the electronic ankle monitoring device.
  • I am really smarter than most people think, and dumber than most people know.
  • Rain is like dirt, but only a little cleaner and a whole lot wetter.
  • People say that Gary Busey's crayola box is missing some of the crayons - well that's downright confusing since I don't own a crayola box.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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