Written by Ducksley
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Topics: Boeing, Boeing 787

Saturday, 26 January 2013

Battery problems have grounded the entire fleet of Boeing's advanced new 787 airliner, but the company says those planes might be pressed into service anyway--on the ground. "Since they can't fly, we were trying to come up with ways we could use them until the restrictions are lifted, and we think this plan is a winner," said Boeing marketing manager Eldon "Boney" Bonetti.

Boeing's idea is to offer low-cost simulated flights on the 787. "For those people who can't afford to actually fly somewhere, they can board one of our grounded 787s and, for a very low price, experience all the joys of flying, including cramped seats, stale nuts and poor service," said Bonetti proudly. He added, "An entire family of four could enjoy a simulated cross-country flight for just a few hundred bucks, and that's a huge savings over a real trip."

The exuberant Bonetti, who sometimes spits when he talks, said Boeing might even hire some fake TSA agents to perform searches before customers board the aircraft. "Doesn't that sound like fun?" he asked excitedly.

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