Written by queen mudder
Print this

Monday, 26 November 2012

image for Gnomes of Zurich rattled at new Bank of England Governor appointment
Library pic of the new Bank of England governor

New York - "In central banking stature terms the man's a midget," the CEO of First Moneylaundering Gnomes of Zurich Bank [USA] Inc said today as news of Mark Carney's appointment broke, "probably only got the Canadian job for keeping his mouth shut about, er, stuff during the Russian Financial Crisis of 1998!"

The appointment of the Bank of Canada governor to replace Sir Mervyn King as head of the Bank of England has dismayed Switzerland's top Manhattan-based banker who has openly ridiculed the appointment of Canadian-born ex-Goldman Sux banker Carney as the new head of the UK's central bank.

Chosen by UK Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne from an impressive list of chief executives running the world's most important financial hubs such as New York and Hong Kong, something on Mark Carney's CV must have impressed in the selection process.

"Maybe he was the 'secret other man' when Osborne was spotted in 2008 on board Russian mobster Oleg Deripaska's floating gin palace in the Med," Our Man at Off-the-Wall-Street News said this afternoon, "along with thugs like Peter Mandelson and Nat Rothschild.

"The whole thing stinks to high heaven."

The appointment carries a $5 million per annum salary as well as a grace and favor apartment in London's Kensington Palace.

Bernie Madoff's still doing 150 years for a Ponzi scam.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 multiplied by 5?

7 22 15 4
64 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more