Written by queen mudder
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Wednesday, 21 November 2012

image for Alien cloning factory found near US Ambassador's Residence
Royal Parks mole warned 'UFO midwife' has arrived for the alien birthings

London - "Looks like ET was planning on flooding the world with hundreds of General Petraeus lookalikes and Mitt Romney clones," the head of the UK Diplomatic Protection Racket Corps said today as the news broke, "we even found their original Paula Broadwell alien prototype!"

The dawn raid by the elite London squad saw thousands of extraterrestrial 'jelly moulds' and 'consciousness motherboards' unearthed in a converted WWII security tunnel linking Winfield House and Regent's Park Mosque.

A tip off from a suspected mole in the Royal Parks had warned of scores of imminent alien 'birthings' at the subterranean complex following the secret recent arrival of a 'UFO midwife' via the Iranian Embassy Spiritual Attache's diplomatic bag.

"Parturitions were thwarted," Commander Boisie Blunderbuss later told reporters at a post-raid briefing, "and the entire extraterrestrial operation closed down including the destruction of rhinoplasty cookie cutters used to carve humanoid features and other sculpting stuff."

Tonight armed guards have sealed off exits to the tunnel as a spokesperson for Ambassador Louis B Susman confirmed 500 tonnes of liquid ready-mixed concrete were scheduled for a Thanksgiving ritual of 'filling in the damned hole'.

Paula Broadwell is 69.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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