Donald Trump held a news conference this morning and targeted President Barack Obama and "Black Magic" as the reason for Hurricane Sandy.
"Trump: "I have been trying to tell the people of America there is something very dark going on in the White House and we now have the truth. I have an explosive video smuggled to me by a confidential source that shows Obama, his wife and David Axelrod standing over a boiling cauldron and chanting: Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble, when shall we three meet again, in thunder, lightning or in rain.'
Trump continued as the attending press corps shook their heads in disbelief. "Here is the most gruesome part of this sad story. The cauldron was filled with all manner of disgusting ingredients: lizards and toads, frogs and feces and even the eye of a Newt! Will this monster from Kenya ever cease in his evil pursuit of power?"
A female reporter from Fox News cried out: "NO, not Newt!"
A colleague calmed her saying, "It's OK, I saw him the other day and he was squinting but OK."
She replied: "But he's always squinting, did that man devil turn him into a toad?"
Colleague: "He's always been a toad!"
Trump continued: "I will not be deterred and to this end I have sent the colored guy this message: "You do that Voodoo that you do so well….so stop it for the sake of the decent people in this country. We want our country back!"
Trump looking triumphant exited the podium as a barber shop quartet sang, "We shall over comb."