Written by Chris Price
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Friday, 28 September 2012

Arlington, KY - The cyber-criminal organization Anonymous claimed another victory against corporate America by simultaneously shutting down three self-checkout stands at a local grocery store.

A mildly irritated crowd of five waited for moments as near-by managers directed them to the nine other self-checkout stands located just feet away.

One shopper, who wished to remain nameless, shared her desperation, fear and dismay by stating, "I wasn't sure what to do when all of the sudden the cashier asked me to use a different machine."

Sources from Anonymous re-asserted several times the precision necessary in a complicated attack and that this store was, "absolutely, exactly who we intended to attack and that the effects were exactly as planned."

Experts estimate that grocery store's lost production time totaled in the high minutes.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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