OLD FOLKS HOME, FL (ABSNN) - Mitt Romney wrote off 47% of all Americans as entitlement leeches, and his running mate, Paul Ryan, pissed off 47% of that 47%, namely the elderly, in a speech today. Congressman Ryan was booed off the stage at a Meet and Greet held by the AARP in Florida on Friday.
The "retirees" began booing the moment Ryan mounted the platform. He could not be heard above the noise of the crowd.
"Hey, you old farts, shut up," Ryan yelled at the crowd.
"Not one year... Not one year... Not one year...," the AARP crowd chanted, drowning out whatever message Ryan had come to give.
"Mitt and I represent 100% of Americans, well, right-wing Republican-Americans. We love the old folks," he tried to say.
"You voted to limit Medicare you dumb ass," shouted septugenarian, Mavis Beacon, famed, dead typing teacher.
Ryan was finally husteld off the stage when the "dip shit old shits (his words)," began hurling bottles, rotten tomatoes, and used condoms (?) at him along with the insults.
"There's a lesson there, somewhere," said a smiling Barack Obama.