Written by b kenneth mcgee
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Topics: Mitt Romney

Thursday, 20 September 2012

In a new tape of a Romney fundraiser in Boca Raton, Florida, presidential candidate Mitt Romney is heard telling $50,000 donors, "The 99% of the others out there simply have no idea what life is all about. They do lots and lots of hard work and we should never forget to be grateful for that. But have you ever smelled them? I mean up close and personal?" Several in the crowd called out, "No." One man put up his hand and said "I did once. It was our gardener. It was awful!"

Romney: "Yes I know. I did too. He smelled so," he paused, "you know, Mexican. We are not accustomed to these odors. After all, my pooh-pooh smells like Aqua Velva, I'm sure yours is the same." One gentleman called out, "Mine smells like Brute!"

]Another gentleman said, "My under pants smell like Dom Perignon!"

A female attendee called out with a giggle, "Mine is like Channel #5."

As the crowd cheered an elderly gentleman in an Armani suit and diamond cuff links stood up and said with a self-satisfied smile, "My secretary says my flatulence is like the sounds of Enya!" The attendees cheered.

David Corn of Mother Jones is reporting that a member of the kitchen staff, requesting anonymity told him that as the dinner was being served two female members of the staff with heavy chest colds stationed themselves at the entrance to the dining area and "hocked a big oyster on every Caesar Salad as it was carried into the hall."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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