Written by mikewadestr
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Topics: Picasso

Tuesday, 4 September 2012

image for Man Finds Lost Picasso Hidden in McDonald's Scratch Off
Where's my fries?

An Ithaca, New York man, Johnny Grit had been going through his deceased father's belongings to see if he could find any pictures of his dad, who was rumored to be a transvestite lumberjack, when he came across a box full of unscratched McDonald's scratch off tickets. He immediately noticed one ticket that was textured differently than the others as well as being situated in a small wooden frame. A picture of the Cookie Monster sitting at a table with a large fries, a coke and a Big Mac was revealed when he scratched off its surface.

"What caught me about the whole thing", stated Mr. Grit. "Was the Cookie Monster had bunny ears on it as well as a pair of polka dotted boxer shorts on his head. I've seen the Cookie Monster and I was pretty sure he did not have any ears. When I looked closer I noticed a signature that read Picasso. I got really excited and immediately took it to the National Museum of Art in Washington to find out if it was authentic and the curator there assured me it was".

National Museum of Art curator, Bill Blindsided verified Mr. Grit's claim with the following statement:

"What Mr. Grit found was a long lost Picasso that no one had ever seen nor heard about titled: Lunch at Lenny's. This is a fantastic find! What makes it more fantastic is the fact that the painting was painted over another painting of the John F. Kennedy assassination which shows Howdy Doody firing the bullet from the gun that killed Kennedy. Heck, from the painting Oswald wasn't even involved in the shooting as can be seen by him stuffing Heidi Doody in a suitcase in the background behind Howdy. This picture was titled: It's Howdy Shooty Time."

"It gets better", continued an excited Mr. Blindsided. "We discovered a third painting painted over by the second painting that shows the Hamburglar giving Ronald McDonald a big wedgie. This painting was titled: The Importance of Clean Briefs".

"This painting is worth over a 100 million dollars".

When asked what he intended to do with the painting, Mr. Grit responded:

"I threw it in the trash because the winnings on the back said I had won a large fries so when I went to redeem it, the people at McDonald's told me it had expired 20 years ago. I mean what's the point in having a 100 million dollar Picasso if fries doesn't come with it?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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