Written by b kenneth mcgee
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Friday, 31 August 2012

It was an excited, enthused but somewhat baffled crowd that gave a standing ovation to Clint Eastwood as he took the podium at the GOP convention last night. "Is he still alive?," one attendee was heard to remark.

The Associated Press in a report from the floor of the convention noted that many in the crowd were amazed that an old pro like Eastwood was breaking out in a cold sweat as he took the stage until one attendee was heard to say in a startled voice: "My God, they're ice crystals!"

The AP states that the convention hall became nervous and apprehensive as Eastwood began his speech. When the famous actor began by saying, "Did you hear the one about the traveling salesman and farmer's daughter," Ann Romney was overheard telling an aide, "Get him out of here, cancel the Fonz for God's sake and who the hell is responsible for this abortion! Did you see those cold dead hands?"

In related news a Romney aide who was on the convention planning committee was observed late last night at the Tampa airport boarding a plane for Chicago. He was wearing a t-shirt that read, "Change we can believe in."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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