Written by Hydrogen Balloon
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Saturday, 25 August 2012

image for Facebook Post Lands Spinster In Mental Hospital
Local Police Enter Miss Smegma's Apartment After Facebook Post

Philadelphia, PA-- A seemingly innocuous Facebook posting has sent a local spinster into the psych ward of a local hospital. Miss Vicky Smegma was taken into custody after making the post on Facebook. She is also facing a host of criminal charges that could cost her hundreds of years in federal prison.

Miss Smegma's troubles began after typing only three words on the wall of her Facebook account:

Mondays are depressing...

Miss Smegma thought only a few of her Facebook friends would see her post and then ignore it. She was shocked to hear dozens of police cars approaching her apartment building only a few seconds after typing in her remark.

"Facebook security alerted us to the post so we responded." said a police spokesperson. "She must be some kind of dangerous nut to post something crazy like that."

Facebook security considered the post as a warning sign for mass murder by a suicidal maniac. The three dots after Miss Smegma's post looked like bullet holes, so Facebook called the local police. They also informed the FBI and Homeland Insecurity.

The police easily subdued Miss Smegma during the arrest. They also shot her French poodle, just for fun. Miss Smegma was then stripped naked and frog-marched out of her apartment building in front of her startled neighbors.

Homeland Insecurity's Janet Napolitano hailed the success of the raid:

"This is a perfect example of Facebook, Homeland Insecurity and local police working together to stop a potential terrorist. Miss Smegma and her ilk must be stopped for all of us to live in a safer, saner country."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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