Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 20 August 2012

image for Mitt Romney To Take Ann Coulter's Advice and Shave His Head
Romney's Mr. Hair Guy Blow Dryer was a Christmas gift from Rush Limbaugh last year.

ASHTABULA, Ohio - Mitt Romney has reportedly confided to one of his closest aide's that the time has come for him to finally make a decision regarding his much talked about hairdo.

Romney said that his very close friend and fellow Republican Ann "Giddy Up" Coulter has suggested that in order for him to be able to totally focus on the political issues at hand he needs to shave his head.

Coulter told the Republican publication GOPicky Magazine that "Old Mittens" hair has now become a big distraction as it is all that some news agencies and media publications are choosing to focus on.

She went on to say that Romney is so obsessed with his grandiose hairdo that he is basically avoiding talking about any of his ideas on the nation's economy, unemployment, senior citizens, and the high prices of cheese in his running mate Paul Ryan's home state of Wisconsin.

Coulter further pointed out that no one has ever heard President Obama talk about his hair and polls show that 97 percent of all American voters admire him for that.

In Late Night News. Jay Leno stated in his Tonight Show monologue that he has some good news and bad news. The bad news is that he has had to lay off 20 of his highest paid employees due to budgetary reasons. The good news is that he will be hiring 20 new employees to take their places at the minimum wage of $8 an hour.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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