Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 24 June 2012

image for Mitt Romney Says If He Loses To President Obama He'll Move To Mexico And Run For President There
A cat named "Old Mittens" that Malia and Sasha Obama gave to Mitt Romney. (Photo courtesy of V.P. Joe Biden).

SAGINAW, Michigan - Mitt Romney traveled to Saginaw to pay a visit to an old high school friend McMillan E. Figglefox.

The Political Salad Bar News Agency had reported that Romney had become somewhat upset with his long time friend.

It appears that Mack The Fox, as he was known back in high school, had stated to his family and friends that he plans on leaving the ranks of the GOP and voting for President Obama.

Romney has stated on several occasions that he and Mack were as close as two brothers and that they used to drink from the same Pepsi bottle, they'd drink a milkshake with two straws, and they even dated the same high school cheerleader Minnie "Pom-Poms" Pompavecki.

"Old Mittens" told The Political Salad Bar that other than himself, John McCain, and Rush Limbaugh, he has never known any GOPer who is more devoted to the party of the elephant than Mack The Fox Figglefox.

When he was asked if he had gotten a hold of Mack, Romney shook his head and remarked that Macky is not taking his calls.

Romney has expressed some concern at the fact that several of his high school friends, who are card-carrying Republicans, have said that they cannot bring themselves to vote for him in the November presidential election.

The former governor of Massachusetts was told that two reasons are because of the fact that he's a Mormon and also because he is constantly bragging about having perfect hair.

One high school friend who gave his name as Grover F. Pankerpink stated that when he informed Romney that he was not going to be voting for him, Romney became very upset and told him that he was lucky that he was no longer a bully like he used to be back in high school.

Pankerpink went on to say that Mitt The Fit, as GOP maven Ann Coulter calls him, admitted to him that he is so upset with things that if he loses the November presidential election he will most probably leave the United States and head down to Mexico where he will join his 40 relatives.

Romney then added that once he gets settled down in Mexico he plans on running against the president of Mexico, Nacho Winslow.

SIDENOTE: Mitt's wife Mrs. Romney (Ann) has stated that if Mitt does decide to move to Mexico he will go without her because she plans on staying in the good old USA since she says she is much too old to learn Spanish, and she has no desire to start learning how to cook Mexican dishes like tamales, tacos, and tostadas.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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