Written by Dan Cun
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Sunday, 10 June 2012

image for Fires In Colorado Started by Army to Burn out "zombie virus" Infected Strongholds
Burn Them Out

Firefighters in Colorado and New Mexico are battling wildfires that are moving fast through parched forests, forcing scores of evacuations and destroying or damaging numerous structures.

However the fires were started deliberately at the bequest of the CDC and Homeland Security in a last ditch attempt to stop the spread of the dreaded "Zombie Virus" which has infected scores of people across North America.

"The idea is to burn as much as possible, thus halting the spread of the virus" said General C A R Motors, who is leading the fight against the spread of the virus, which leaves victims drooling at the mouth, with super human strength, a hunger for human flesh and itchy feet.

"We have managed to smoke out a pocket of infected people; we rounded them up and took them into quarantine where we then injected them with Lindsay Lohan shot - which kills the virus. These people are now fully recovered, albeit homeless and destitute."
The Lohan antidote does have side effects that include a constipation, runny nose and in some cases instant death.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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