Written by Dan Cun
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Friday, 8 June 2012

image for I'll Have Another won't run Belmont; He Has The "Zombie Virus". Has Been Destroyed.
Zombie Virus Now Affecting Annimals

The racehorse I'll Have Another has been scratched from Saturday's Belmont Stakes, ending its bid to become the first Triple Crown winner in 34 years, as he has contracted the dreaded zombie virus.

The beast is reportedly foaming at the mouth, has a hunger for human flesh, has super horse strength and may have diarrhea.

News of the withdrawal comes after O'Neill sent the horse out to the Belmont Park track for earlier-than-usual training Friday morning - jogging a half-mile and galloping a mile, it was then he turned into a zombie, heading straight for a stable boy, who was lucky not to get eaten by the crazed nag!.

Had the horse won the Belmont, it would have been the first Triple Crown winner since 1978, when Affirmed won the Kentucky Derby, the Preakness Stakes and the Belmont Stakes, unfortunately the curse continues, the zombie virus strikes again, and of course the Pakistanis, Iranians and maybe even the Triads have something to do with this.

Luckily though the virus will not affect horses in the race as I'll Have Another, who actually won't have another anything, was executed, a single bullet fired into his head, his lifeless body was then paraded in front of the media, as a warning, to other horses, who may feel like attacking humans.

That will teach him.

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