Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 10 May 2012

image for President Obama Changes His Mind And Says That He Now Supports Gay Marriages
President Obama on the phone telling Jody Foster he is now for same-sex marriages.

CINCINNATI, Ohio - President Barack Obama was speaking before a large gathering of The Amalgamated Waiters & Waitresses Federation of America when he was asked about his stand on gay marriage.

The president smiled and raised his eyebrows a little bit. He then spoke and said that in the past he has been against it.

He added that he felt that marriage has always been between a male man and a female woman exactly as all wedding towels convey with their "His" and "Her" monogrammed themes.

President Obama brought out the fact that on several occasions he has actually gotten into heated debates with same sex partners.

He mentioned that last year while appearing on The View he got into quite a loud exchange with rock singer Melissa Etheridge who has been married to women on two different occasions.

At one point Etheridge became so upset that she threatened to hit him, Joy Behar, and Elisabeth Hasselbeck with her guitar.

Another time while having a hamburger at a Burger Bandit in Avocado Heights, California, the president got into it with former 'NSYNC boy band member Lance Bass who said that one thing about same-sex marriages is that it is a form of built-in birth control.

The president was recently asked by Coquette Eucalyptus with The West Hollywood Flaming Gazette why he was against the gay union.

He informed Miss Eucalyptus, who is an avowed lesbianite, that he did not really feel that he wanted to be responsible for confusing and even traumatizing little American kids.

President Obama emphasized that youngsters would turn to their parents, grandparents, uncles, aunts, or teachers and with a puzzled look ask why Jane and Jill are getting married and why Jack and Jim are getting married instead of Jack marrying Jill and Jim marrying Jane.

Miss Eucalyptus asked him what finally happened to change his mind. He grinned and said that he found out that a lot of the television shows, motion picture studios, recording companies, beauty salons, and interior decorating agencies are owned by gays and lesbians.

He said that he figured that it really is not going to hurt anything if he allows gay guys to marry gay guys and lesbianite gals to marry lesbianite gals.

He then quipped that there are community pockets in Arizona and Alaska where that kind of thing has been going on since the early 60s so he figured what the heck.

In A Related Story. FuFi Fondue owner of The Haven of Hair Salon in Beverly Hills is so thrilled at President Obama's change of heart that he has offered him, the "First Mama (Michelle Obama)," "The First Mama-In-Law (Marian Robinson)," and "The First Kiddoes" (Malia and Sasha) free hair cuts, colorings, stylings, manicures, pedicures, and York Chocolate Mint Patties for life.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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