Written by Kid Icarus
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Thursday, 3 May 2012

image for Angelina Jolie saves children
Satan is asking people not to kill babies because he was a baby in heaven at one time.

California - Angelina Jolie is advising parents to leave their children in hospitals, fire stations, police stations and emergency medical facilities as required by law instead of killing their babies.

Police officials argue that a parent's worst enemy wants them to leave their babies in a safe place rather than see the babies harmed or killed.

Mac Henderson, a police officer who gives traffic tickets said, "Babies have an appealing appearance even to those that are powerful or hateful." Henderson states that serial killers would rather murder a woman than do harm to a baby because babies are lovable and adorable.

The most dangerous person in the world would admit that babies are important because society can benefit from them when they grow to adulthood and are used for labor and other forms of gratification.

Prison officials, that enjoy arresting parents and putting them in prison to be ravished by homosexuals and lesbians, are telling parents in the public to please not kill their babies because the babies belong to the legal system and society in general. A prison official said the military needs the bodies of babies to fuel their war machine in the future.

Angelina Jolie claims that Illinois was the first state in the nation to pass a law requiring every hospital, fire station, police station and emergency medical facility that is required to accept a relinquished newborn infant in accordance with the Abandoned Newborn Infant Protection Act to post a uniform sign in a conspicuous place on the exterior of the building informing persons that a newborn infant may be relinquished at that location.

Ex husbands, ex wives, ex boyfriends and ex girlfriends are imploring with their privious lovers and spouses to please leave their beloved little ones in a fire station because they can't live without the children.

"This will help clarify to the public what locations are Safe Havens in Illinois, and help save the lives of more babies," announced Jolie on behalf of her 'Save the Babies Foundation.'

Make Kid Icarus's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 1 multiplied by 3?

7 3 10 12
115 readers are online right now!

Go to top