Written by b kenneth mcgee
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Topics: Mitt Romney

Wednesday, 2 May 2012

Mitt Romney in an effort to ingratiate himself to the Latino community sent out a video late yesterday to honor Cinco de Mayo day.

Members of the press and the Latino community were not surprised at the content. Evidently, Romney in a burst of enthusiasm made the video without consulting his staff.

An anonymous source within the campaign confided to a reporter that Ann Romney became physically ill upon learning of the release. The video was pulled from the web site.

Politico has published the contents of the comments.

"Buenas Dias my friends from your favorite Gringo!" Romney chuckled and continued, "You know, I actually knew Chico before he was famous. He worked for us on the estate picking vegetables. I'll never forget him; he was a happy little monkey.

"He'd bring his little Taco Bell dog and you could just see how happy they were! Ann and I would send out scraps from our brunch, you know, Patti de Fois Grass and Truffles," he paused, "on paper plates with plastic spoons of course. Anyway, we'd watch from the window as he and the little pooch would sniff at the plate and then roll on it! Ann and I would laugh our asses off!"

Staff members, speaking on condition of anonymity, said Ann Romney grew red in the face on seeing the video and stormed out of the office.

The tape continued;

"I hated to let Chico go but you know I was going to run for office. I couldn't do it myself so I called immigration and hid in the bathroom when they came to pick him up. I never knew he would become so famous. Anyway, happy Chico de Mayo day to all.

"For those of you who are legal, remember to vote. For those of you who are not, grab your ankles and prepare to depart. Remember my little Cucarachas," he paused, "border patrol agents are people too, my friends!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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