Philadelphia, PA-- Vicky Smegma's idea to have a party for her Facebook friends turned out to be a bad idea. The lonely spinster spent thousands of dollars to cater a banquet for her 400 Facebook friends. Nobody came.
Miss Smegma thought everyone would come to her gala. She rented an expensive hall for the celebration and even hired a band. Lobster tails and fillet mignon were on the menu, as well as caviar and don perignon champagne. The total cost of the party was almost $160,000.00. Not one single 'Facebook friend' even bothered to show up.
"Well, we worked together about five years ago, but I don't really know her." said one of Miss Smegma's Facebook friends.
"We trade game tokens a lot on Facebook, but we haven't spoken to each other in ten years. Can't really say we're friends." said another Facebook user.
Miss Smegma sat in the empty banquet hall on the day of the party and cried and cried. She looked at the empty chairs and the expensive food and sobbed for an entire hour. Finally, she got control of herself and went home to her lonely apartment. She had made a decision and she planned to keep it.
When Miss Smegma came home, she went on her computer and de-friended all of her Facebook friends.
"What a bunch of shit Facebook is!" she said to herself.