Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 25 April 2012

image for Due To The New Orleans Saints "BountyGate" and Now "MicrophoneGate" The NFL Ruling Commission Is Seriously Considering Banning The Saints From The NFL
The illegal microphone in the general manager's suite was hidden in the left epaulet of the life size statue of Napoleon.

NEW ORLEANS - Well it certainly appears that with the latest "Hidden Microphone" development the New Orleans Saints have just about showed the world of professional football that they would be much better suited operating in the professional wrestling world.

As if BountyGate wasn't enough of an embarrassment for team owner Tom "Chevy" Benson, who is 84, now comes word that his general manager Mickey "The Mouse" Loomis had a microphone hidden in his Superdome suite which was used by opposing coaches and team executives to discuss team matters, apply for bank loans, and download music.

This new scandal is being referred to by Sports World Magazine as MicrophoneGate and promises to reveal some unbelievable information that was documented by an, as yet, unnamed New Orleans source, identified only as "Deep Throat" Thibodeaux.

According to Tango Brisket with Sports World Magazine the team should maybe consider printing up bumper stickers reading "Can You Hear Me Now?" in order to offset some of the tremendous fines that will no doubt be handed down by NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell.

The commissioner, who has already netted out fines and suspensions to Head Coach Sean Payton as well as other coaches, will now be turning his attention to handing out fines and suspensions to the players who were involved in the unbelievably scandalous BountyGate.

The word down on Bourbon Street is that the BountyGate and MicrophoneGate scandals could also involve the New Orleans team mascot Gumbo The Dog as well as four unnamed Saints cheerleaders.

A source close to NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has stated that if this in fact turns out to be the case then The NFL Ruling Commission will most certainly consider banning the New Orleans Saints from the National Football League.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I spoke with Louisiana stand up comedian Zydeco Dupree and asked if he knew the names of the four Saints cheerleaders. He told me that he used to date one and her name is Alexis Figfauster. Dupree divulged that Alexis told him that the names of the other three New Orleans cheerleaders are Cookie Dilldiddle, Kaitlan Mintmuffin, and Courtney Pillacoochee.]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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