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Friday, 13 April 2012

image for Hyper Warp Drive Commercial Passenger Plane Leaves for Mars
"Marsport Flight is Delayed"

Denver CO: Ares Space Lines (ASL) announced its inaugural hyper warp drive flight of mid-November 2050 from Denver International Airport to Marsport, carrying 300 paying passengers, has been sold out. Marsport is a settlement on the planet Mars populated with people transported from Earth by conventional rocket propelled vehicles.

The Federal Aerospace Administration (FAA) had certified the first Boeing 909 space plane employing hyper warp drive technology. Two dozen dry-run test flights carrying dummy passengers and cargo weights were operationally flawless to Marsport and back to planet Earth. Hyper drive technology allows for a 1.5 minute flight time to the planet Mars, once the plane reaches the Earth's stratosphere and the drive is engaged.

Captain Edsel Murphy started up the engines, received flight clearance and ASL Flight 1 taxed to the runway. At that moment a freak snowstorm hit the mile high airport. Passengers were stuck on board for seven hours with little food or water and overflowing lavatories. Then a large warm air mass engulfed Denver International Airport and melted the snow.

Captain Murphy opted to take off, fearing another snowstorm, and entered into hyper warp drive. Thus, 1.5 minutes later ASL Flight 1 was circling the planet Mars with 300 passengers anxious to land. Unfortunately there had been no communications with Marsport about a planet sized dust storm on Mars. Passengers were stuck on board circling for another seven hours with very little food or water and overflowing lavatories. Then the storm abated and a landing occurred.

A very upbeat retired Mars astronaut deplaning was overheard saying "15 hours sure as hell is lot better than eight months in space!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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