BOSTON--Sources close to the family are reporting that Father Goose, who left to go get breadcrumbs six years ago and didn't return, is finally back in the picture.
"We couldn't be happier!" exclaimed Mother Goose, author of such classic children's stories as Humpty Dumpty and Little Miss Muffet. "It's like he never left. In fact, some nights, when I would softly sing my eight little goslings to sleep to the tune of Mary Had A Little Lamb, I would pretend he was there with us, honking drunkenly at the TV like he always did."
Friends of the Gooses say the jobless sleazeball still hasn't paid any of the child support payments he owes, and is probably just back to cash in on the whole loaf of bread his youngest son nabbed from the corner market a week ago.
At press time, Father Goose was politely reminding Mother Goose that her writing was terrible, and that she should go and fetch him another slice of bread.