The meeting hall was crowded with media yesterday afternoon after the advance press release reached their offices. Newt Gingrich was to announce that the GOP convention in Tampa was going to be a "buggered" convention!
As Gingrich approached the podium, an intrepid reporter from the New York Times called out, "Newt, didn't you mean a brokered convention?" Gingrich flashed his trademark, "I hope you rot in hell," grimace and replied,"Can you hear?! Do you have ears?! Do they only teach you how to transmit but not how to receive when you join the left wing, commie, socialist, Jew dominated national media?!" The reporter looked down at his note pad as Gingrich continued;
"I SAID buggered, I didn't say brokered, I said buggered, I'll spell it, B-u-g-g-e-r-r-e-d. Got it?!" He paused and grinned sardonically as the NYT reporter's face flushed red. Gingrich continued, "Here's the point. If I can't be captain,I won't play,and if I cn't play, no one will live to play another day. Tampa will make the salting of Carthage by the Romans look like a trip to Disney World!"
"How about Santorum?" called out a journalist from Fox News. "Did you say, sanitarium," replied Gingrich, "or was that just word association?"