Written by jessica w
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Topics: Hillary Clinton

Monday, 19 March 2012

image for Hillary Clinton Rushed to Hospital, Suffers Mental Breakdown

WASHINGTON - Hillary Clinton was rushed to Georgetown University Hospital late Sunday evening after suffering from a mental breakdown. After an anonymous tip was called in to local authorities, Officer Dwight Leram discovered the dazed and confused Clinton dressed in a dirty poncho and Ugg boots. Reports state she was licking a Snicker's wrapper clearly obtained from the trash can.

Once Leram realized the disheveled woman in front of him was Hillary Clinton, he knew there was some sort of mental issue. He decided to call an ambulance so she would get to the hospital as fast as possible. "She looked crazy. I needed to get her sedated so she wouldn't harm herself or anyone else," is how Leram explained his decision to call the medical professionals.

Friends and family have been concerned about Clinton's mental state ever since Michelle Bauchman was announced as a potential running mate. The family hired therapist Dave Trotter to stay with her at all times. They thought it was necessary to have round the clock therapy, should disaster strike.

Disaster came in the form of a comment request from ABC News. Trotter, who was with her when the call came in, stated, "She slammed down the phone and went into the other room. I thought she would appreciate a few minutes alone". Once Clinton was alone, she disguised herself in the yellow poncho typically worn by gardeners and escaped through a downstairs window.

Bill and Chelsea could not be reached for comment, though it has been confirmed the two are by her side. Rumors are circulating that Clinton will be entering a live in facility, immediately following the hospital stay. This has yet to be confirmed. Family friend Lisa Zegs told reporters, "I can only imagine what will happen if Michelle Bachmann is elected. Hillary needs to learn the coping skills now."

President Obama will be addressing the nation at 8pm EST tonight regarding this matter.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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