Written by Don Fulsom
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Topics: Old People

Saturday, 17 March 2012

Should Hugh Hefner get a dead person's working kidney to replace his own faulty one just because he's a national treasure? Yes, according to a group of senior celebrities led by Betty White. "We even think non-celebrities who are elderly should be on the organ list," Betty told a press conference at the 10th anniversary of the "Organs for Seniors Club"

"So what if we've had no success so far," declared Miss White. "At least we've raised the consciousness of the nation and the coffers of our club."

Betty said she is well aware of the shortage of kidneys, and that some people will question whether scarce youthful organs would be put to better use in patients younger than Hefner.

But Miss White points out "older people have made this country great, and they deserve a break just for getting so old. And just think, some of these oldsters-if they had new, young kidneys, could turn out to be big stars in their Golden Years. Like me. I have the kidney of a 19-year-old electrocuted murderer. And it works fine, except when I get nervous and wet my diapers after killing someone.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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