Written by Jeff Brone
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Topics: Barack Obama

Wednesday, 21 March 2012

The President assured the American people that he and the middle class were just friends, and nothing "funny" was going on.

"I care about the middle class. I'm a friend to the middle class, and want the American people to know that" the President stated during a meeting of the "Middle Class People are the Backbone of America" association in Rockton, Iowa. "But that's it, just friends. Nothing inappropriate is going on, and our emails are strictly platonic" the president added, while appearing very caring but slightly aloof in reference to the problems facing the middle class.

One middle class member of the audience stated that "Since we are the lynchpin that holds our great nation together, I know the President is on our side, just as any politician who claims to be on our side is" but added "I also know that he's just a friend, nothing more. I'm happy with that relationship. If something else was added, it could ruin the friendship."

Another member of the audience took time out from supporting the national economy by putting out the cheese puffs to say that she "trusted the president" to help out the middle class in "only appropriate ways" and "not by doing anything creepy."

After the meeting the president was happy to shake hands with the attendees. But he wasn't unusually happy.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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